Breaking up with Zomato

Hello ex-lover,

I understand you are having a hard time moving on, your late-night drunk notifications say it all. But, my heart is all empty for you now, just like my cart.

I understand there was a time I were adrak to your chai but I think it is now time to say bye-bye.

I will surely miss the moments we had together.

Those late-night scrolls,

those lovely dinner dates and

tumhara Shabri waala pyaar; mujhe khana khilane se pehle try karna.

Those Netflix and chill sessions and

those stress eating sessions.

You always knew my food mood and never forgot to ask "mere baby ne thana thaya" with your numerous notifications.

I cannot help but admit all of that was as cheesy as your cheese-burst pizza.

But,

in lockdown, when we were apart,

I saw the things as they were. Ours was just a toxic relationship.

Your 'deals' were never "just for me".

You were never "exclusively" mine, you were always just after my money(CGST+GST+Delivery charge). Such a gold(membership) digger!

I had nothing to gain nothing from the relationship, of course except for the belly.

These last few months taught me apni khushi apne haath me ho hoti hai(no pun intended).

Ye shona mona se daalgona ka safar aasaan to bilkul nahi tha par shuru majburi me kiye the aur ab maza aa rha hai.

I hope you understand that things cannot be the same once again but I hope we remain friends(with 50% off benefits).

Aur haan...yaha se bhut door..

fat percentage count aur perfect BMI ke paar...

ek maidaan hai, kya pata kabhi vaha se order aaye mera aur mulakaat ho. After all, nobody knows it better than you ki aadmi ke dil ka raasta pet se hokr jaata hai.

Acha ab bye,

Khana thanda ho rha hai!

Comments

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